Many of us would do anything for love, simply put. To have someone completely devoted to you, someone who adores you, who breathes and lives for you, it’s what we all dream about. Your ride and die, someone who you can call at whatever time and just blubber, or maybe someone you feel you could just stay in bed and cuddle with forever. It really all is but a fairy tale for most of us.
However, there comes a time when we think we’ve found love and just to protect those small instances of joy, we would do and stand just about anything. This brings what we want to talk about today lovelies, pure psychotic love!
To anyone who’s never actually fallen in love with a psychopath, I bet you can’t help but wonder, “why the hell don’t you just leave?” and, to all those who’ve fallen for one, I bet you wondered, or still are wondering, “why the hell can’t I just leave?” Hopefully, by the end of this reading, you all will understand why it’s not so easy actually leaving and what happens to you during and after your relationship.
Psychopaths seduce you and sometimes it’s simply magnetic. No matter what you do, you’ll just find yourself drawn to their powerful pull. Someone, I really wish I knew who, anonymously said that it’s because their seduction is an art of the con wrapped in the beautiful illusion of love.
So beautifully poetic if you ask me. But when you actually think about it, for my steamy erotic novel readers, the male main characters are in most if not all cases, this lowkey millionaire psychopath. Look at the popular “Fifty Shades of Grey.”
He was hot and freaking rich but guess what, our dream guy was a full-blown psychopath and it took a massive toll on Anna. But maybe just maybe his crazy obsession with her made him even more attractive to her. Does that make sense? I really hope it does.
So maybe, that’s one reason why you fell for him, psychopaths nature is spellbinding. Not each one will be the dreamy Christian grey, some are grandiose, deceitful, impulsive, and in many cases, they neither have a conscience nor remorse. Wait, I almost forgot that they’ll most likely have some criminal traits.
Don’t beat yourself about it if you fell head over heels, you won’t notice all these things until it’s too late. They’ll hands down be the most charming and yes ladies, you really won’t be able to resist.
Pretty scary right? But, I have a tiny bit of good news, psychopaths are only 1 percent of the whole population. We still, however, can’t ignore, the utter devastation that they leave to those unfortunate enough to cross paths with them.
Okay, so now we know why they’re so damn attractive and irresistible, now let’s find out the actual impacts felt by “Anna” and all you other beautiful ladies who’ve survived or are still surviving our psychotic not so prince charmings.
The study was held by psychologist Adelle Forth of Carleton University in Canada. Many of the participants had been in these very toxic relationships for about two to five years. The assessments included post-traumatic stress disorder, depression, and psychological questionnaires. Here are some of the impacts that one would experience.
1. Emotional Impact
I think that this was among the saddest effect that was faced. We, women, are sensual beings, and that only means that we are more in touch with our emotions. It, therefore, becomes understandable to feel such intense anger, irritability, frustration, and even hatred. The saddest part is when we let these negative emotions consume us.
“For a while after the relationship, I was angry at having
been deceived on such a deep level.”
Once we let these feelings consume us it’s only a matter of time before we’re plagued by anxiety, fear, panic, and paranoia. Our hearts go out to those who reached a point deep in depression and felt as though their lives were meaningless.
“I hit rock bottom in my life. It was the most painful experience I have ever endured. I for the first time thought of suicide as life was too painful to deal with.”
2. Biological Impact
If you thought that the effects were only mental and emotional, well, I’m so sad to say that these relationships also affect one’s body. Some of the most common problems that many survivors have faced include, stomach and intestinal complications, ulcers, and headaches.
The stress you probably are going through will take a toll on your appetite leading to drastic weight loss. Not just that, but your hair might start to fall off or may even start turning grey this is then accompanied by severe dehydration. Ladies, these psychotic men, and even women have the power to completely take away that beautiful glow you have.
Other health complications experienced were heart and respiratory problems, endocrine and urologic diseases such as diabetes, and autoimmune diseases for example rheumatoid arthritis.
“I now believe that my arthritis, colon issues, etc. are directly related to the stresses of living for 14 years with a psychopath. The amount of personal energies required to handle getting through day to day life with him seemed to have sucked health from me personally.”
If all that wasn’t bad enough, some survivors heartbreakingly faced physical injuries like broken ribs and black eyes. Surviving all that just shows how strong you are and you have to do everything in your power to make sure that that crown stays on top of your head.
3. Impacts On Our Behaviors
In many cases, nothing really beats the company of friends and loved ones. Those awesome nights out when you can just let your hair down and just breathe. Well, chaotic dancing and singing can be involved too but I’m sure you get my point. This is one other thing that is robbed from you. Most of the survivors said that they couldn’t imagine going out and appreciating social contact. Really trying not to cry right now because no one deserves to see their loved ones and only wants to be alone.
Their sleeping and eating patterns also changed with some experiencing insomnia. Their self-love wavered and some started substance abuse and smoking.
4. Cognitive Impacts
The survivors in addition to PTSD signs also experienced intrusion in form of flashbacks, dissociation and had challenges with concentrating and remembering. How can anyone pay so dearly for simply opening their heart out to someone? I can’t help but despise those that completely destroy someone who loves them like this. And I don’t really know if these psychopaths care but it just isn’t right.
5. Interpersonal Impacts
Once you let someone in, and you get burnt this badly, you sincerely lose trust in everyone else. The world becomes this big selfish place where everyone has a motive, keeping all this personal information that may one day cost you so much more than you’ve already lost. And what happens when you have nothing left to lose?
Betrayal becomes this constant fear over your shoulder clouding your lens of judgment. Can you really survive someone else abandoning you?
“I feel empty and lonely, all the time. Like I’ve lost everything good in my life because I’m an idiot and fell in love with a psychopath. I have little hope for being able to find someone, or anyone who will ever understand me or want to date me.”
It’s not easy, and I know that being in such a situation, can dim so many beautiful things in your life, but there was something positive that came out of the study. And it’s that we all are made of something much greater and much more powerful. This is what will make you resilient and strong enough to overcome that which is so heavy on your shoulders. These lovely ladies is what we define as post traumatic growth.
